By Gerald Korson
Voice correspondent

When the diocesan Catholic Funeral and Cemetery Services purchased Cooper’s Mortuary in Oakland two years ago, it learned that 33 sets of cremains were stored there because no one in the families of the deceased had claimed them.

The former operators of the Fruitvale Avenue establishment had kept the ashes and urns safe in case someone were to return for them. Some of the cremains had been in storage for a decade or more.

Because the Church views the body with great reverence, the diocesan cemetery office went to work in order to ensure that these cremains would be given an appropriate final resting place.

“We attempted to contact every family,” said CFCS director Robert Seelig. “We took all the steps to let family members know about the situation.”

After a final notification to the families that the unclaimed cremains would be interred, Father Patrick Goodwin, pastor of St. Theresa Parish in Oakland, led a committal ceremony at St. Mary’s Cemetery. Several cemetery employees and diocesan staff attended.

Abandoned in death
“What was most touching in Father Goodwin’s homily to us was that we were there as Church to help heal the lives of those who had been abandoned in death,” Seelig said. “In many cases, there were individuals who may have been hurt during their lives, and in death they were ultimately forgotten about.”

Such concern for the proper care and handling of cremains has led to a new CFCS initiative. Under its Holy Angels Remembrance Program, CFCS will conduct a solemn committal service and entombment of cremains at no charge in the Crypt of the Holy Angels located at all six of its cemeteries as well as the mausoleum at the Cathedral of Christ the Light. The offer is open to anyone of any faith who has kept ashes in their home or find themselves not sure of a final resting place, Seelig said.

The problem of unwanted cremains is not an unusual one for morticians, he noted. In fact, it’s something mortuaries must deal with on a regular basis. After six months of storage, a mortuary is free to bury unclaimed ashes unceremoniously in a local cemetery. Cooper’s Mortuary had patiently held out hope that the abandoned cremains might be picked up by loved ones and receive a meaningful interment surrounded by friends and family members.

The private disposition of ashes by family members is another concern. Often the ashes are scattered over land or water, a practice that lacks Church approval. At other times they are kept on a mantle or shelf in the home, divided among family members, mixed with the ashes of other relatives, or simply buried on private property.

According to the diocesan cemeteries office, more than half of all Catholics in California choose cremation over burial, and only one-third of those who are cremated are placed in a cemetery, crypt or niche.

A positive impact
Locally, however, the Holy Angels program is having a positive impact. In its first two years, 213 sets of cremains were interred, and in 2009 the total number of Catholic cemetery interments in the diocese increased for the first time in seven years.

Seelig recognizes several possible motivations for the handling of ashes by survivors. Interment in a niche, crypt or cemetery ground can be expensive. Families might not want to establish a “final” resting place because they believe they might move from the area someday. Some fear that no one will visit their loved ones in the cemetery, or that they might feel guilty for not doing so themselves. For some, keeping the cremains in the home may be a means of not dealing with their loss and delaying the grieving process.

“Quietly we hear families tell us stories of loss,” said Seelig, recalling a woman who had scattered her daughter’s ashes but later purchased a niche to place her photos and mementos. “Often after scattering there may be remorse because there is no place to go to honor the memory of the deceased.”

It’s an issue that also has Father Goodwin troubled.

“People scatter ashes a lot on the West Coast,” he told The Voice. “That’s become almost like the routine. I think part of what has happened for us is that the ‘busy-ness’ of life has taken away from us a lot of our reflection time on the sacredness of life.”

Seelig said the funeral and burial services are a major part of that reflection time and a necessary component for helping family and friends grieve and find closure.

“Cremation is not wrong, but it does provide a challenge on how we ritualize the grieving process,” he said. “We want families to see the value of remembrance, of ritual, and of care. In the case of the abandoned, we are the caretakers, and the Church can be trusted to provide the rituals for grieving and remembrance that we find so healthy as we move on in our lives.”

The Holy Angels Remembrance Program addresses all of these concerns — financial, practical and emotional.

“Our cemeteries are a place for the living as much as for the deceased,” Seelig said. “We want families to realize the value of having the remains placed in a cemetery where we pray for the deceased every day.”

For more information, contact Catholic Funeral and Cemetery Services at (510) 581-2425.

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