January 9, 2006VOL. 44, NO. 1Oakland, CA

Ministry addresses post-abortion trauma

By Sharon Abercrombie
Staff writer

One night, during Theresa Karminski Burke’s freshman year in college, a friend threw a party in their dorm. It turned out to be the social gathering from hell as guests participated in a bizarre game of soccer, using the heads of her friend’s antique doll collection as the balls, defacing and “torturing” them.

Burke was horrified by the crowd’s seemingly inexplicable behavior. More than a decade later, while she was in graduate school, her path again crossed that of her dorm mate who confided that she had had an abortion just weeks before the party.

That admission gave Burke a clue into how people hurting from unresolved issues over their abortions can symbolically act out in unorthodox ways.

She saw that the soccer game “had been an outlet for grief, a symbolic means for the party crowd, many of whom also had had abortions, to mock, belittle, and display mastery over the babies who were never allowed to be born, but who still haunted their memories.”

Acting out one’s pain around abortion is not that unusual, she said during a recent visit to the East Bay.

In the early 1980’s, as a counseling intern, Burke began seeing a pattern emerging among her own clients -- women with eating disorders -- and was able to put two and two together.

One afternoon, a woman brought up the subject of abortion during a group therapy session, blaming her bingeing and purging on a long-ago abortion.

“It was like a bomb going off,” said Burke. “One woman began cursing and swearing, saying it never should have been brought up. Another woman left the room. All but two of them had been sexually abused. Some of them, as it turned out, had had abortions.

So, the question, ‘What’s eating you?’ was particularly relevant here.”

But Burke’s supervisor reprimanded her, saying the topic of abortion did not belong in a support group setting nor, indeed, any place in therapy. Burke, however, disagreed.

After earning a doctorate in counseling psychology, Burke started one of the first therapeutic support groups for women at her Center for Post-Abortion Healing.

Several years later she added an experiential healing ministry, called Rachel’s Vineyard, to help women and men suffering from post-abortion trauma.

She and her husband, Kevin, a licensed social worker, work full time in Philadelphia, Penn. as counselors and directors of the ministry. They are also the parents of five children.

Without a budget, office, or advertising, Rachel’s Vineyard became a grassroots national outreach. Through word of mouth, the interdenominational retreats began to spread across the country, from 18 retreats in 1999 to 250 retreats annually in 45 states and 22 countries.

Rachel’s Vineyard is different from traditional talk therapy or from going to confession, explained its creator. “Women have told me they’ve been to confession 150 times, and the guilt and sorrow still never go away.”

Little wonder that this is so, said Burke “Abortion is so profoundly invasive” that it affects a woman at every level of her being.
“She is violating herself as a mother, a protector, and this is very unnatural.”
To be healed, Burke said, one must go back and put the bits and pieces of brokenness back together into wholeness through ritual, prayer, discussion, Scripture reading, meditation, and a memorial service.

One retreat exercise is based on the Scripture story of Bartemaus, the blind man who asks Jesus to give him his eyesight. “Have pity on me,” Bartemaus pleads. “What do you want me to do?’ Jesus asks. “Heal me,” he replies.

During Rachel’s Vineyard retreats, a priest or minister stands in for Jesus, said Burke.
Through role playing, the Scriptures can come alive and become personalized for each participant.

The retreats also include group and individualized discussions, giving men and women permission to get in touch with past losses and grief and to replace traumatic memories and images with ones of compassion, forgiveness and acceptance.

“Many people are sidestepping the politics of abortion and finding healing and hope through a Rachel’s Vineyard retreat,” said Burke. “Combined with their courage, Rachel’s Vineyard is healing one heart at a time.”

Burke was the keynote speaker at a Rachel’s Vineyard Ministries international conference at San Damiano Retreat Center and at St. Isidore Parish Center in Danville, Nov. 13-18.

Sponsored by the Diocese of Oakland’s After the Choice Post-Abortion Outreach program, the conference hosted over 100 retreat leaders, pastoral care ministers, and licensed mental health workers who use the Rachel’s Vineyard healing model.

After the Choice ministry sponsors Rachel’s Vineyard retreats several times a year. Inquiries and participation are strictly confidential and financial assistance is available.

For further information, call Monika Rodman at (510) 267-8394 or e-mail her at mrodman@oakdiocese.org.

Theresa Karminski Burke

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